Free Vasectomies!

Here in Mudville, everyone is very community-minded. I can't believe these things happen, but there are some people who are born here, grow up here, attend college here, marry here, work here and never leave here. NEVER LEAVE HERE!

Sorry.

About 2 weeks ago, the Mudville Optimist Club was advertising their annual auction and a list of the available items was in the newspaper in its own insert. It was actually quite lengthy. I thought it was really nice of all these businesses and individuals to come together and donate items and services in order to help the Optimist Club help youth. But I had to laugh.

One of the donated items....a vasectomy. It was offered by the general surgeon here in town who actually did Brian's hernia repair last summer. I just thought that was hysterical. There are probably not too many surgicial procedures that are considered elective, and I guess he wanted to contribute to a worthy cause. I just thought it was funny. I tried to find out how much the vasectomy went for, but that information was not available. The Optimist Club did raise over $45,000. Not too shabby.

A story about Dr. Erck:

Last summer when Brian had his hernia repair, Dr. Erck did the surgery. He was very thorough and explained things in great detail and gave us all the possible scenarios. When we were at the hospital and Brian was all hopped up on pain medicine, I expressed my anxiousness over not being able to supervise the washing of hands. What if the doctor and staff forgot to wash up? Brian, in his drugged state, thought this was funny and when the doctor came in, told Dr. Erck that I was concerned about his handwashing practices. He assured me not only would he be washing his hands, but he would also be wearing gloves.

I was instructed to return to the waiting room and informed that the scrub nurse would call me there and let me know when the surgery had started. When I received the phone call, she advised me the surgery had started and said, "Dr. Erck wanted to let you know that everyone in the room has washed their hands." Ha, ha, ha.

Fast forward a couple of days when a high fever necessitated a trip to the ER where Dr. Erck was waiting for us. We were directed to a room by a nurse and Dr. Erck stepped back to let us pass and I turned to him and said, "I hope this isn't a result of poor handwashing..." The nurse looked at me like I was crazy and I got the last laugh as Dr. Erck stammered, "But I washed my hands...."