This week has been busy, busy, busy. Last Sunday, I was so stiff and sore, I could barely move. After church, Brian and I drove to Fort Worth to meet Brian's younger brother who was getting us the deal on the cell phones. I like the new phone, but I haven't had the time (nor the inclination) to enter my address book into it. All in good time, I guess. If you're interested in our new numbers, let me know (either by email or by noting...I've got everyone's email that reads, I think) and I'll be glad to give it to you.
In Sunday school last week, we got the book that the Sunday School class is doing. It is called "Love & Respect". Brian and I read some of it on the drive to Fort Worth. It actually had one of our arguments in there...nearly verbatim. I think God is trying to show me something in the way that I communicate with Brian. I know that I'm not the only person that deals with this thing so I thought about sending an email to all my old friends and let them know about taking a look at this book...but I see that another church I know is doing a study with this book. We haven't read very much, but I highly recommend that wives take a look at it...especially if they want to better things in their marriage. Ladies, we are not giving our husbands what they need and therefore, we are not getting what we need. I know that we have touched on this in Bible Study a couple of times, but maybe we have glossed over the really important part. (At least I didn't get the important part.) The Bible tells us to respect our husbands. And I know that we think we are...but we're not. What we're doing is loving them and it's not the same thing. So much emphasis is put on love when it's our respect that they crave. They would do without our love just to have our respect!!! Absolutely mind boggling to me. Something God revealed to me is this: you can learn everything in the world about love languages and try to talk to your husband with that...but the key to that is that men don't question our love...they question our respect, because we do things that are disrespectful. Me...I have tone of voice problems, but I think my tone of voice does belie the way I feel alot of times and my poor attitude is doing damage to our marriage. I hold Brian to a standard that I don't hold myself to and expect him to get accomplished things that I can't or don't, especially when he is alone with the girls. And I make my displeasure known by questioning everything that he is done or doing. I harp on the things that aren't done instead of thanking him for what is done. How is that showing him that I respect him and his contribution? By demanding that he come home and take over for me, is that showing respect for him going out in the world and earn a living? He needs time to decompress. It certainly isn't as if he isn't willing to help out once he gets home. It's all the little things and the little critcims that are tearing him down. I guess I could go on and on. I heard that the Bible study saw a video that probably discussed this. Brian and I heard that author on the radio a week after we moved here when I was taking him to the airport. I think God is really trying to tell me something... The really neat thing is that I see these opportunities coming up for my old friends to learn the same things that I'm learning here!!! I didn't intend to go into all this detail, but God is trying to work in this marriage on this issue and I know that I'm not the only one.
I was going to go back to the gym on Tuesday, but Brian and I went to Dallas to look at a car that I found on eBay. End result? We now have a 2nd vehicle!!! We found a 1997 GMC Suburban for about half what we were going to pay for Brian's company car. It's got 170k miles on it, but seems to be in good condition. Obviously, it has a lot more room than the Impala and a Suburban was more what we really wanted anyway, but didn't think that we would find one that we could afford and that looked nice. We saved enough money by buying this vehicle that we can take it to a mechanic and get it inspected very closely and fix anything that is an immediate need. And I have a car that's paid for!!! The dealership put new tires on it and delivered it to our apartment so we wouldn't have to drive back to Dallas (about 2 hours away).
And with the new car I can put Lily into the preschool program, go to Bible Study during the day, go to MOPS during the day, workout during the day (because the gym has child car during certain parts of the day) and pretty much anything else that I have a mind to do. It's really fascinating how God provided this truck. We have been waiting since the end of May for Brian's car. (Everyone knows how we have been waiting!) In fact, we are still waiting although it's scheduled to be delivered sometime in the very near future. I found this truck on eBay in Dallas. It is much easier to get to Dallas from here than from where we were living...and this dealership would have normally sent this truck straight to auction, but decided to give it a go on eBay. The auction price was way below retail and there were no bids on it. Even while I waited for Brian to get off work so we could look at it, there were no bids. We were able to get someone from the church to come watch the girls at the last minute so that Brian and I wouldn't have to worry about them (since we didn't get home until midnight). And then we got to the dealership and the truck was exactly like the ad said and the sales manager came in and told us exactly what we were getting. Closing the deal was an easy process involving me writing a check and signing some paperwork. What a blessing.
Thursday: Back to the gym. I followed the program given to me by the trainer and felt good when I left there. I walked a mile and a half on the treadmill increasing both speed and incline. When I finished, I knew I'd gotten a good cardio workout and then I did 3 sets of 12 reps on 3 upper body machines and 3 lower body machines. I'd felt the "burn" and was proud of myself.
Friday: Worked out with Amy. That girl is tough. She really pushes me and when I accomplish it, I feel so good about myself. She said I had already improved from the previous week and that makes me feel like I'm making progress. I like coming home all sweaty with muscles shaking and tight because that makes me feel like I've done something.
Saturday: After some hemming and hawing, I went to the Body Blast class. Last Saturday, I felt completely out of my league, even though I felt good for having made it through the whole class. This week, it was taught by someone else so it was different, but still hard. The hardest part for me last week was that they ran some laps in the parking lot to warm up. I am so not a runner so I was about done after the running. But I talked to the instructor about warming up on treadmill instead of running laps, but since there were so few of us in the class, everyone warmed up on the treadmill. That worked out much better for me. Of course, after that, I was worn out. My arms were so sore...I could hardly pick the girls up...but that's a good thing. Brian says that pain is weakness leaving the body!! I feel much better today and am looking forward to trying a kickboxing class tomorrow morning even though I am still a little sore from Saturday.
I think God has been working on our hearts regarding this church. I have felt since Day One that this was the place that God had for us. Brian was reluctant to commit. Until this morning. So, we are officially members of this church and it makes me very happy. It is also very scary to me because I am much more comfortable to hang back and not take the lead, but now, I want to be involved with everything! I think my time to rest is past and it's my season to work. They have a nursing home ministry where they go every Sunday and sing songs and bring a brief message. This morning they told of a need to have more people participate so I went. God has really given me a heart for the elderly and I'm so pleased that this is a place where I can serve. In fact, we may be able to start an extension of that with a shut-in type ministry like our old church.
This week starts the women's Bible study and MOPS and I'm looking very forward to it all. I am very anxious to get involved. I think it's going to work out that I'm going to be able to go to Nashville to the MOPS convention and I'll have the opportunity to get to know other moms in the church during this trip. I know that God has some very exciting things for us here and I am so anxious to be used.