Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Calm

For the last 6 years, I have either been pregnant or with a young baby. This time last year, I was very pregnant and begging my doctor to take this baby EARLY, when I still had several weeks left. It seemed we could never go forward in our lives because we were always starting over with a new baby.

But more often these days, even in the midst of complete and utter chaos, I get the occasional feeling of calmness, because we are moving forward. No more babies to start over with; no more pregnant days. Ever. And I'm really glad for it, too. I am definitely not a person who enjoys being pregnant, and that is an understatement.

I am really enjoying the fact that the kids are getting older even though I feel like I manage them relatively well at home. I really don't like to take them all anywhere all together, even though it can be done. At this point in time, I have 2 kids with strep throat and raging fevers. Trying to keep them separate from the "well" group, while taking care of them, is rather difficult. I feel like I'm going from one fire to the next. As I sit here, it's nearly noon and lunch will be required soon, I am committed to make a lasagna today for a family who has recently experienced a devastating loss, the kitchen needs to be cleaned up from dinner last night [must be done before I can cook a single thing!], and I have a 4-page layout that must be completed for my scrapbooking class on Friday. Oh, and laundry. The ever-constant. It seems the idea of keeping the house clean is a complete joke. I am too busy keeping children alive.

To add to my list, I'm in training for the 3-Day in November and will begin my internship for the ombudsman program next week. I have quilting projects I'd like to work on and perhaps even finish(!), and I'm coming into the phase of my life where I might like to enjoy my family, instead of feeling worked to death...

And I honestly think it's completely due to my knowledge that the baby train is an idea whose time has come. And I am relieved.

3 comments:

Marla said...

It is a good feeling to be out of baby stage! I am excited too to move on to the next stage of life!

ali said...

same boat- NO MORE KIDS! im 41 years old, been at this for 21+ years.. thats it. youngest is almost 3 and im ready to think about ME. glad i checked in with you, thanks for your commnet on my blog. enjoy the quiting, but quit the scrap booking class LOL

shanon said...

There is something to be said for the peace of mind that comes with KNOWING you're finished with that part of your life. And as we talked about before, this phase in which they are all so little and needy seems like eternity but is truly over so quickly. I'm so proud of the mother you are, and the fact that you are keeping in touch with who you are outside of motherhood. That's a difficult feat, and one you will be so glad you've pulled off when those rugrats are bigger and don't need you nearly as much. Love ya!